Niche: Middle-aged LDS women/LDS divorced women

To find more from Tanya, please click HERE.

No one ever gets married with an intention of getting divorced and yet divorce is something that still happens. In the Church there are a lot of thoughts that surround the topic of divorce and it can be a hard arena to know how to navigate both as someone going through a divorce and someone supporting a divorcee.

After being married for over twenty years, Tanya Hale decided that divorce was the next best step for her. She says it was the hardest decision of her life and yet she has used it as something that has allowed her to grow in the ways she knows Heavenly Father needed her to grow and it has truly allowed her to know how to fully love herself. 

You can hear the growth in her voice as Tanya gives great insight on how to gracefully navigate this often difficult situation. If you or someone you know have gone through a divorce, this interview is a definite must listen.

 

Takeaways:

*We often don’t know how to support those who have gone through a divorce. We know what to do for people who are widowed, but not those who are divorced. 

*One of the best things we can do to support those in divorce is to not judge them. 

*People who go through a divorce are still people. They aren’t a special category.

*Being seen in the Church is important for a divorcee.

*Lots of people in the Church drift away for a while after a divorce because they don’t feel seen. 

*As a divorcee you have the power to step into relationships the way you want to and create what you want in your life. 

*We often hide behind other people. When you get a divorce there’s no one to hide behind so you often have to discover who you really are. 

*Getting to a place where we love ourselves and accept ourselves and the path we are on creates peace, courage, and confidence that you can move forward no matter what the future holds. 

*Grace is the space we are given to make mistakes.

*As long as you are blaming everything on your ex-spouse you stay stuck. When you open up a space to view how you contributed to the demise of your marriage then you can move forward.

*We can’t change the past, but we can change what we do today.

*When we let go of all the years of hurt and resentment then we can move into a space of charity for ourselves and our former spouse and have greater healing. 

 

Discussion Questions:

  1. If you have gone through a divorce, what has the experience taught you about yourself?
  2. How has the Atonement of Jesus Christ helped you heal from a divorce?
  3. What have you found to be the most helpful thing others who have supported you through a divorce to have done?