I think it would be safe to say that every mother has an idyllic vision of how her children will turn out when it comes to the choices they will make and who they will become. Many think the hard years of mothering are when kids are young and require a lot of time and energy.
However, mothering dreams rarely turn out the way one thinks they should and the energy required to stay engaged in your children’s lives doesn’t stop once they are able to dress and feed themselves. Sometimes the hardest part of mothering comes in watching your adult children choose very different paths than you would have chosen or dreamed for them.
But just because your children choose differently than you had hoped doesn’t mean you can’t enjoy them and be close to them. Come listen to Bonny Scott as she shares how to genuinely like your adult children and love them no matter what.
- One of the greatest shockers for parents is to discover that their kids don’t grow up thinking they had the best parents.
- As children become adults they can be brutal in their assessment of their parents’ parenting, but they often do that because they are still trying to navigate their own lives.
- Parents need to be careful to not make their kids responsible for their emotions. Parents often want their children to live a certain way so they – the parents – can feel better about things.
- As parents we are not just to teach and help our children, but our children are here to do the same for us. Often this comes through their struggles and choices.
- When you suffer as a parent because of your kids choices, that feeling is legitimate, but it’s not necessary.
- To fully love and fully enjoy our children and all their choices, is a skill we all need to learn.
- Hope in the future is a good thing, but it can get us in trouble if we don’t enjoy the here and now.
- When you let go of self-judgement, that is when you get to stop judging your adult children and enjoy them.
- Letting go of expectations for our children is hard at any age. What do you feel you would be losing by letting go of expectations? What do you feel you could gain?
- What does unconditional love mean to you?
- How do you feel about the concept that as you love yourself, you are more easily able to love others?
To continue the conversation with Bonny, please join us on Clubhouse September 23rd @ 1pm MDT. Click HERE for the link.